Mathgiving

i haven’t posted in a while because i have been working way too much and my job has been preoccupying every spare moment of my waking and sleeping hours.  when you start dreaming about work, you know you are in trouble.  yesterday was thankgiving and i didn’t have any plans since i don’t have family in the area so i had premeditated a day of netflix and leftovers.  but at the last minute i was invited to have dinner with a friend from church and his family.  i debated my options and in spite of my introvert-self, I opted in on hanging out with a group of strangers (yes, if you’ve ever met me this is shocking).  so i determined to break out of my recluse tendencies to be social and celebrate the day. 

thanksgiving is an interesting holiday.  it is only a holiday in the states but when you consider the idea of taking a moment to be thankful for all that you have, you realize (or should realize) it really makes sense.  i know that it is so easy for me to forget just how much i have, how blessed i am.  i can so easily focus on the how much trouble my job is causing me or some other challenge in my life, when in fact god has blessed me with more than i deserve or realize.  i wonder what it would be like if we had many days of thanksgiving, not just one day year.  i wonder how different we would be if we were really thankful for what we had instead of spending so much energy focusing on the difficulties in our life or what we think we deserve.  i wonder if our relationships would be different, better, both with ourself and each other if we changed our perspective just a little and were thankful.

in the spirit of thankfulness, i headed to my friend’s house for dinner.  there was quite a group – turned out to be 12 in all, wow!  i think that all holidays are best celebrated with children and his two nieces were there, they are adorable.  i rarely get to celebrate holidays with children since i live so far away from my family and because i have only a few young cousins that i don’t actually see very often even when i am home.  the house was filled with people that made me feel incredibly stupid.  with conversations from math to physics, anatomy and physiology and more, i felt like a high school drop out among phds.  during casual conversation, his sister solved a 4x rubik’s cube and reminded us that it’s just a matter of simple mathematical patterns (right, that’s what i was thinking all along). 

but feeling like the invited dunce wasn’t so bad when you balance it out with the laughs i enjoyed around the kitchen chaos and family stories.  i actually felt right at home with that little bit of chaos around the house, everyone running here and there, sometimes not sure which way is up, but nearly sure it’s all going to come together in the end.  the only thing missing was the arguing i’m accustomed to at the traditional holiday meal and well, to be perfectly honest, i was ok with that.  a holiday without a fight is….something to be thankful for. 

but nothing is without it’s, let’s say interesting moments.  i’m not accustomed to, nor do i desire to become accustomed to people i’ve never met touching my hair….repeatedly.  maybe it’s just those introvert, antisocial tendencies popping back up, but i don’t know.  and most people who know me know that i’d be happy to talk to them about what i believe about god, but with people you’ve never met, “religion” never seems like a good topic for discussion.  there are always motives behind their asking that i can’t figure out and i think it’s best to slip past that topic until the conversation can be had in the context of a relationship/friendship.  but, there it came, five minutes after walking in the door, and again, and again.  i was a bit puzzled by the repeated questions about church and i kept deflecting them.  unfortunately for my friend who came with me, she caught a couple of the deflections (so sorry, not my intention) but some of our dinner acquaintences seemed satisfied with the non-substantive answers.  and this only goes to prove my point, that there is some motive behind the questions other than wanting to really know the answers to the questions being asked.  did i mention that i stink that these games and don’t want to play?

but in the end i have to say, i was reminded again how thankful i am.  thankful for friends to spend great times like this with.  thankful for family who i love even though they are far away.  thankful that god has blessed me with more than i could have asked for or imagined.

Cup of Tea?

I’ve just recently finished reading one of the most amazing books.  Perhaps you have heard of it, since it has won all kinds of awards, as has the mountaineer Greg Mortenson, whom the story is about.  The book is called Three Cups of Tea: One Man’s Mission to Promote Peace….One School at a Time.  Mortenson was attempting to climb K2 in Pakistan (the world’s second tallest mountain), when he got separated from his climbing party and nearly died trying to find shelter.  His story of survival in the harsh conditions is the story of someone who found his mission and calling in life in a most unexpected way.

In the very remote mountains of Pakistan he meets Haji Ali, the leader of Korphe, the village that nurses him back to health, who becomes like a father to him.  While Mortenson instantly feels a connection to the people, the culture and the community, it takes him a long time to adapt to the ways of the Balti and other peoples in the Karakoram Mountains.  One day Haji Ali explains,

Here we drink three cups of tea to do business: the first you are a stranger, the second you become a friend, and the third, you join the family, and for our family, we are prepared to do anything – even die.

Mortenson thinks he finally gets it.  This is not America and you can’t do business like you do in America.  The point is not to get down to business, talk business, keep a professional business attitude.  It’s about relationships.  Talk about a change of perspective, attitude and a complete paradigm shift.

But the most inspiring part of Mortenson’s story is his mission to build schools in the forgotten places of (first) Pakistan and later Afghanistan, especially for girls.  He sees first-hand how children are raised in an environment of terrorism, educated into terrorism because it is the only form of education offered to them.  So, with the help of many people, he created the Central Asia Institute and starts building schools so children can receive an education just like I did, and you did and your children will.  He doesn’t do it without consequence, repercussions or a bit of a fight, but he does it and with great success, right through 9/11, the fall of the Taliban, the fall of Baghdad and all kinds of hate mail against his family through that time.

Mortenson’s story is one I hope we can all learn from.  Violence only breeds more violence.  But he is building a legacy of peace, here through education.  I can only hope that someday I will be able to have a sliver of this kind of impact on the world, maybe the Middle East, helping build peace through whatever means make the most sense in my life.

Here’s how you can read Three Cups of Tea (and you should definitely read it):

http://www.threecupsoftea.com

http://www.amazon.com/Three-Cups-Tea-Mission-Promote/dp/0143038257/ref=si3_rdr_bb_product

is it the leaves, the apples or maybe the squirrels?

today is the first day of fall.  it has been well documented in my posts that i am from california so fall was not even on my radar when i was growing up.  my first experience with fall was when i was about 10 years old.  my family spent the month of october in chicago visiting my extended family.  i vividly remember the huge piles of leaves in the front yard that we would pounce on and roll around in.  i had never seen so many leaves in my life.  i could be completely buried in leaves, along with my little brother, and i had the time of my life playing in them.  my aunt and uncle patiently raked them up in piles day after day for us little california kids to play in.

and then there was the apple juice and apple butter that we purchased from the local amish communities.  i don’t think i had ever heard of apple butter before but i sure loved it. apple butter on toast, peanut butter and apple butter sandwiches, apple butter on biscuits, you name it and i put apple butter on it.  it was like a whole new world opened up to my 10 year old diet (incidentally I still really like apple butter but am a little more discriminating about what i put it on).  i was only 10 though, i don’t remember the leaves changing colors on the trees, just them being on the ground.  i did however, become a lifelong chicago bears fan during this trip.  i was so moved by seeing soldiers field and the being in the city (just more proof that i am a city girl at heart), that i fell in love with the bears that fall too.

but until many years later when i moved to the boston area that was it, my only experience with fall.  yet something strange happened when i moved.  it was mid-august so fall was quickly approaching and before i knew it, i loved fall.  it was my favorite season.  every year, i can’t wait for it to come.  and all around you hear people saying how much they love fall – so it’s not just me.  does my 10 year old experience tap into something that about fall that really captures people?  fall does come right at the end of summer, which i personally find disgusting – but again we have established that my views on heat, summer and sun are not shared by all.

is it the collage of fall colors coating the leaves?  a brisk morning walk or weekend getaway to take in the variegated mountain views? maybe it is a saturday morning of picking plump apples to make your favorite apple pie, apple juice or another cinnamony apple creation.  and then there are the pumpkins at the road side farm stands.  every size and shape you can possibly imagine.  you can carve them, paint them, poke things in them, and if you are really adventurous you can take them to the famous keene, new hampshire pumpkin festival.  but perhaps it is the squirrels.  in fall they come out in droves. i think squirrels must multiply like rabbits in the winter because come fall they are everywhere – dead and alive.  it’s really kind of disgusting and personally i hate them.  i have nightmares of them crawling up my leg or something.  and yet everyone seems to think they are so cute with their big bushy tails.  i have a black squirrel that lives outside of my house.  it’s the only black squirrel i have ever seen, apparently a walnut squirrel, but whatever, still a squirrel.

so what is it about fall? my october is booked up already with fall activities.  my facebook friends are all excited about fall.  everyone loves it and it seems there are a lot of potential reason to love it.  i just keep wondering, is it all about the leaves?

holiday and hope

nori al-khattab

while a major population of the non-western world is in the middle of the most important holiday season of the year, the west seems entirely oblivious.  i’ve never been in the muslim world during ramadan (insha’allah, the time will come), i think it would be both amazing and scary to be part of it.  most westerners don’t even know what ramadan is all about, except the sawm, and while that is the most public and recognized part of it, it is not the reason for the holiday.  you could ask a muslim and they would be happy to tell you.  you might even make a friend in the process.

but since it is the whole point of this blog i guess you will learn something, even if skewed from my western point of view.  i think ramadan is an amazing holiday that is filled with hope and excitement – that’s why i would love to actually live in the muslim world during this time of year.  the month (by the way the name of the month is actually ramadan in the islamic calendar) commemorates the time when muslims believe that the qur’an was revealed to mohammad by the angel gabriel (jibril).  on one particular night, laylat al-qadr, many muslims believe that god may speak to them and respond to them in particularly powerful ways.  this year the date will be saturday, september 27.  this is indeed something to look forward to with hope and excitement.

ramadan is also about salaah, asking god to purify your heart, to forgive your from your sins.  sawm, as it is in all faiths that practice it, is only an outward sign of an inward spiritual hunger for god.  ramadan isn’t or i guess shouldn’t be all about food.  i think any muslim will tell you that – again good opportunity for a conversation and making a friend.  and the salaah is very important.  muslims go the mosque even more during ramadan than the rest of the year for the recitation of the entire qur’an so prayer throughout the muslim world seems like it must be at year-long high right now.  hope for god to speak and answer your prayer, especially the dua, is very high.

i wonder if this hope for god to respond and answer can be carried on when ramadan is over.  it seems to me that god is still there when ramadan is over.  who he is has not changed just because the holiday has ended.  maybe he wants to respond and answer the dua all year around.  that seems like something really worth putting my hope in.

life begins again

when you live in a place like boston/cambridge, life revolves around the academic year whether you like it or not.  the year begins in september, not january, when the million or so students flood the city and ends in may when they leave.  the madness of my job begins in august as we prepare for the students’ return to campus and ends in mid-may after they leave.  that’s just how life is.  but i realized this last weekend that there is a microcosm of my life that truly dictates the beginning and end of the year.  it is football season.

i can feel it.  i can feel the anticipation and excitement.  i can hardly wait for week one.  it’s worse than waiting for christmas as a five year old.  the weeks of pre-season only feel like torture because they don’t build excitement.  they just stick some crappy players on the field and no one is seriously invested in how well they play because half of them won’t make the team.  the most excitement i could find was the orton-grossman battle and, seriously, that was not very exciting because whoever won i could not imagine the team was going to ultimately win – how sad is that?  so i hardly catch a pre-season game because pre-season performance means absolutely nothing – unless you break your ankle or something.

but sunday was week one.  my new year has begun and what a year it was.  within minutes brady is out for the season with the mysterious, yet-to-be-named knee injury.  three more qb’s, smith, young and warner, also get hurt on week one.  newly minted jet, favre, seems to be on his 9th life with a last second victory over the vikings.  and one the day’s big surprises was that defending superbowl champs, indy, were squashed by my beloved bears even if qb victor, orton, only put in an acceptable performance – but were we expecting more from him?  elder payton played a quite sluggish game even if he did throw for 257 yards (over orton’s 150) and his surgery was on the knee not a shoulder or arm.  and it was rookie running back, forte, who turned in the surprise performance of the game with 123 yards and a td.  he seems to have real potential, particularly in light of the passing challenges for the team.

and to top things off, my fantasy football team won too.  week two feels like it will never get here!